Mom, how are you? Mom, is it hurt for just make me born, make me see the world? Is it hard to raise me? Is it felt nasty to get the dirtiness from me? Is it?
Mom, do you ever get hurt when I yelled at you, when I did not listen to you, when I ignored you, when… when…when I did wrong things to you. Too many things that I did mom, I cannot count those things anymore.
Do you remember when we know about your breast cancer? That time I’m with you in the hospital. I saw you cried, then I asked you “ are you okay mom? Are you crying?” and you said “ no. Just dust get inside my eyes” that time, I still too young to think anything more than believe with what you said, I kept playing by myself after you said you were okay. Or do you remember when I move to the new school, in 4th grade in Indonesia, the time we arrived there is when students doing the ceremony of Indonesian flag, I don’t go there to be with the other instead I was with you, holding your hand, not let you go. I was so childish and too shy to do anything rather than be with you. You ask me to be brave, to go there, but still I’m too shy to go and the ceremony is already done too. When students that going in the same homeroom ask my name, my sound is so little and because my name with ‘R’ and I can’t pronounce the letter ‘R’ it’s hard, then you help me say my name. Because you I got friends easily.
Mama, there is stars everywhere... if I could fly and take those star I will give it to you. If I could touch the sky... I will get the cloud to make your pillow... if, just if... when I said those things to you mom, you just want me to be my self, no if, no imagination about my self. That’s what I love about you. You want me to be just whatever I am. No other people or imagination about myself, because it will change everything, everything about ME.
You are the world best mother, woman, and wife in this world! I really am proud of being your daughter. You are my role model. You are strong, internal and external. You made me brave, be more courage. You are the best mother, woman and wife in this big wide world. And wherever you are, you always in my heart. You are everything.
It’s been about a year and 3 months we not met each other, face-to-face I really is miss you, I know you miss me a lot too. You know, when you around nothing are went wrong? I swear. Your smile Make me feel more confidence, your hug make me warmer, and your laugh make me want to laugh too! Mom, hope somehow I can go to Indonesia to meet you, dad, and all my brothers and my nephews. To feel the warm of yours hug and feel the way I felt years ago.
HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY!
Love your daughter,
Peserta # S.4.1
Peserta # S.4.1
